mac'n'cheese'n'wet panties

yesterday my roommate and i were perusing the cornucopia of entertainment that is internet television and we stumbled upon that show kath & kim, which we both agreed was worthy of our do-nothing afternoon. we proceeded to watched 5 episodes, all that we had access to, in one sitting. if you've seen the show, and hopefully you have, because i'd wager to say it's better than most, the kim character is always shoveling garbage food down her throat. i believe i was about 3 or 4 episodes deep when i saw kim attacking a bowl of kraft mac'n'cheese and the "fuck yeah, that's what i'm having for dinner!" bell went off in my head (nice product placement kraft mac'n'cheese, well played. you got me). i try to stay away from trashy foods if i can, you'd be hard pressed to find me in a mcdonalds or a taco bell, but i do let myself indulge occasionally. so, as i began boring my roommate with my culinary intentions, we started talking about how kraft mac'n'cheese usually needs to be served with something else to cut the megacheese flavor. growing up my mother always served it with dinner sausages, the roommate's preference was the mildly more plebeian canned weenies. then i mentioned that, when sausages aren't available, i sometimes like to take it real trashy and put ketchup and sriracha sauce in there... hey, at least it's not ranch dressing or anything. at any rate, i later wandered over to the grocery store to pick up one of those oh-so-familiar blue boxes- yeah i even skipped the healthier option of Annie's Organic instant mac'n'cheese. i wanted the real deal, mother fucker- and as i half heartedly wandered the isles trying to think of anything else that i might need, inspiration hit me in the canned vegetable isle. Inspiration, thyne name is "diced tomatoes with green chili peppers". ok, if you're ever in the mood for some cheap, easy, trashy comfort food, be it due to dubious advertising techniques or not, i suggest you try this, because it is basically now my favorite thing to eat ever. make the damn mac'n'cheese as usual (although i used 1/8 cup heavy whipping cream and 1/8 cup water instead of 1/4 cup milk, just cause it's all i had available) then after it's all cooked and mixed together dump in 1/2 a can of inspiration. stir and then eat... and then ejaculate all over yourself. i would also suggest adding any leftover meat that you might have around. i had a small piece of steak from the night before that i cut into little steak bites and they were pretty awesoooooome. i imagine that sausage or canned weenies would be good too. so there. there's a tip from me, the future fatty and ghetto gourmet. bon appetite!

The Rebirth of Fool

Here I go again on my own! I was talking today with some friends about "internet classics" because one friend sent out a group email that was all "check out this 'Yacht Rock' series!" Yacht Rock in 2008? Damn girl. Have you seen the Star Wars Kid? Anyway, this led me to thinking about the internet back around 2005 and it dawned on me that I used write this here blog. So I hunted myself down, which is, admittedly creepy. And, man, 2006 got DARK. Who took my sunshine away? hm? Really, I want to know who it was... I'm taking names. I will get you and make you PAY.

Ok

So there have been other blogs since this one, because I am a filthy whore and my dark heart will never understand the concept of "commitment", but reading back I kind of like this one the best. In this instance, the first cut is, in fact, the deepest. So, I'm sorry jellyfish blog, I never meant to hurt you. Please take me back baby. I'll do anything. I looove you, blog. I do. Ah, yeah, I feel a bit rusty and maybe a bit old and worn down, the years of drinking and supplementing drinking have dulled my little brain I'm afraid. I don't know if I can come up with crazy pseudo science posts anymore, but maybe with some practice I can come up with something. I do recall hearing briefly about inanimate forms having memory. Apparently, after being damaged, something inside of them yearns to go back to their original form, so when they're damaged a second time, they tend to try absorb the energy in a way that will make them as they once were. BUT, this is all very vague, and I can't remember what the term for this phenomena is, and I really need to read more about it before I can talk about it in any serious way. But Think of the implications this has on the whole concept of memory or cognisance. How can a nonliving thing remember? That shit's CRAZY! Also, when you think about it, matter is just energy and energy can't be created or destroyed, so, at what point does a form decide that this is the one that it associates itself with? Why is the birth of a tin can acceptable, but the birth of a dented tin can not just as valid? How much does a unit of matter have to change before it just shakes up the etch-a-sketch and starts over as something else? I guess it's like the difference between puberty and death. And I wonder if you asked 100 dead people which was worse, how many would answer "puberty".