wouldn't you like to get away?

oh man. it's 2pm and i'm alone at work and there's a ton of beer in the fridge. i am really tempted to drink one, but i'm afraid that one will turn into 4 and 4 will turn into me getting giddy and leaving early to call someone to meet me at a bar and then, of course, things will turn fuzzy and fuzzy will go as far as fate will take it. it happens. i keep teetering on the edge this moral dilemma. am i a functioning alcoholic, or am i an urban 20 something who has no real responsibilities? alcoholic? slacker? alcoholic? fun girl? pretty much the answer to this question hems on a glass-half-full/glass-half-empty perspective of the same situation. i don't know if picking either side is actually going to change anything. there is a possibility that it will, but i know me and my habits and the possibility is slight. besides, you'd think that saying "yeah, i'm an alcoholic" would be the one to have the positive effect, but if full dedication ot either attitude did change the way i'm living now, i bet it would be the opposite case. i bet i'd go "i'm an alcoholic, thems the breaks, at least i'm good at something. now, give me another." then i'd just settle into a lifetime of lushery. like if i'm an alcoholic i'm a victim and i can't help myself, but if i'm an aging bar girl, well that's just pathetic and embarrassing. ahhh who knows.

so, with that in mind am going to get a slice of pizza and drink a beer with it. delicious. i will also refrain from drinking any other beers just to prove that i am neither alcoholic nor fun... just a terrible employee.

cheers